Jobs for the blind!!

Category: Let's talk

Post 1 by lawlord (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 5:24:53

Now, the other day I was having an intriguing conversation on here over the public quicknotes: some of us were being suitably conservative, but others were asserting that being blind doesn't matter, you can do absolutely any job apart from drive if you have the determination to do it. This is so patently not true that I thought that she who made this assertion, and those who agreed with her, were joking, but no!!! The aforesaid zoner maintained that she would be determined to join the army when I put such an occupation to her, and although she retreated a little from this later on she still maintained that you could do anything even if you were blind! That's not true of course. it got me thinking, however, about jobs that would be completely unsuited for blind people, such as a handwriting expert. How many blind handwriting experts do you see around the place eh? so, zoners all, your challenge is to come up with similarly inappropriate occupations for blind people, something that imagining a blind person doing makes you laugh. The more politically incorrect, and the more inappropriate, the better! the objective of this topic is not to be helpful at all. On the contrary, treat it instead as a joke at all our expense.

Post 2 by Stefan (Generic Zoner) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 6:07:29

along the transport line of thaught, how about a pilot as 20 20 vision is required

Post 3 by Twinklestar09 (I've now got the bronze prolific poster award! now going for the silver award!) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 6:28:55

In the army, a soldier, because you have to be able to know whose who. (In my opinion, we shouldn't need to have war, but that's getting off topic.) But anyway, as a soldier yeah, you'd have to know who and where the enemy soldiers are.
Leilani

Post 4 by lawlord (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 7:10:55

Hmm, good efforts so far guys, but we can do better than that surely? How about a blind accident reconstruction expert?

Post 5 by sugarbaby (The voice of reason) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 7:12:35

or what about a blind cosmetic surgion!

Post 6 by sugarbaby (The voice of reason) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 7:13:45

or a blind eye surgeon

Post 7 by lawlord (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 7:25:19

Now a blind eye-surgeon would just be irony personified! What about a blind war correspondent, stumbling around?

Post 8 by kool_turk (This site is so "educational") on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 7:37:33

How about an astronaut.

Post 9 by Stefan (Generic Zoner) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 7:41:46

blind optician?

Post 10 by sugarbaby (The voice of reason) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 8:38:12

or astronomer?

Post 11 by sugarbaby (The voice of reason) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 8:41:16

or what about a blind photographer. "I'll do your wedding photo's for ya, the results will be blinding" ...

Post 12 by sugarbaby (The voice of reason) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 8:42:59

or a blind camera man

Post 13 by lawlord (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 9:13:53

Or a blind postman. stumbling around.

Post 14 by wildebrew (We promised the world we'd tame it, what were we hoping for?) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 9:25:10

Hehe, I'll have to cross the line here, blind gynocologist (especially amale one) now that'd be quite an interesting job, blind fashion expert would also be in good order and blind interrior decorator, something I think would certainly make for a fun job and interesting homes.
I think in the case of the blind soldier every soldier in every army should shout his/her country or ethnicity identification once every minute in order for blind soldiers from the opposite army to hit him/her with a bullet, I think otherwise it's just simply not fair game.

Post 15 by Freya (This site is so "educational") on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 9:33:18

how's about a blind trapeze artist eh? Now who was this person who made the claim that blind people can do anything...or is that classified info?

Post 16 by lawlord (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 9:53:40

How about a blind crystal-gazer?

Post 17 by sugarbaby (The voice of reason) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 9:58:42

or a blind skyDiver

Post 18 by Freya (This site is so "educational") on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 10:01:35

joking aside sb, I know a guy who is blind and sky-dives apparently! He also recently climbed to the summit of Kilimanjaro...in a group with a guide of course. Pretty amazing!

Post 19 by lawlord (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 10:03:14

Indeed, very amazing. But he had sighted assistance of course and if he had not, then he would have had to use the rocks on the mountainside as a form of braille I suppose.

Post 20 by wildebrew (We promised the world we'd tame it, what were we hoping for?) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 10:17:01

a blind cartographer would certainly make a fortune, coming up with exact map of countries along with descriptive information about vegetation etc, this might be mighty useful and, the obvious of course, a blind bus driver .. and also I really do wonder what my hair would look like after going to the blind employers only barber shop, a blind hair stylist would definitely do well in the arts community.

Post 21 by lawlord (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 10:20:50

Additionally, I'm not sure whether a blind miner, quarryman or crane-driver would inspire confidence.

Post 22 by sugarbaby (The voice of reason) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 10:24:37

hehehehe, well actually I think wildebrew has just found me the perfect job! .. i would like to open a hair dressing salon ... I'll set a new trend in hair styles ... any takers?

Post 23 by sugarbaby (The voice of reason) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 10:33:14

and as part of the service I shall also offer a makeover service

Post 24 by Freya (This site is so "educational") on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 10:52:18

Miner would be ok it's dark down there anyway....

Post 25 by lawlord (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 10:54:57

Before you go to Sugarbaby's hairdressers, make sure you're ensured against losing your ears.

Post 26 by sugarbaby (The voice of reason) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 10:56:55

ah yeh it's dark, but the blind minor wouldn't know when the canary snuffed it because of the poison gasses ...

Post 27 by Freya (This site is so "educational") on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 11:00:47

he might just hear the thud as the poor little mite hits the bottom of his cage....awwww PS sugarbaby can I make an appointment for ear trimming pls?????? hehehehe

Post 28 by sugarbaby (The voice of reason) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 11:13:14

and let's not forget ... the blind cartoonist! ... yes freya you may come to my salon at 9:00 sharp tomorrow

Post 29 by Goblin (I have proven to myself and the world that I need mental help) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 13:35:56

F

Post 30 by Goblin (I have proven to myself and the world that I need mental help) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 13:38:34

F1 driver...mountain rescue helicopter pilot....air traffic controller...art critic.....film director...forensic photographer...professional darts player...jet pilot..SAS member... pub bouncer in Glasgow...footballer..

Post 31 by sugarbaby (The voice of reason) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 13:38:55

and goblin giving us the example of the blind iliterate I see ...

Post 32 by sugarbaby (The voice of reason) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 13:41:08

AH NOW WE GOT IT ...

Post 33 by Inesle1987 (Account disabled) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 14:09:09

Well blind people can do every job if they have sighted assistance. How about a blind person dealing wit hchemical things? This might have dangerous consequences if he uses the wrong chemicals, lol. I never heard of a blind person studying chemistry or medecin.

Post 34 by Goblin (I have proven to myself and the world that I need mental help) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 14:14:54

Every job so you would be quite happy if the pilot flying to your rescue was blind...Its a nice ideal this we can do anything but unfortunately impossible...yes a blind person could fly but only for their own enjoyment...

Post 35 by lawlord (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 14:28:14

Blind people can't do everything, because in some jobs, let's face it, they'd be blundering fools! can you imagine a blind fireman for instance?

Post 36 by Senior (I've now got the bronze prolific poster award! now going for the silver award!) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 14:52:31

I think they should have purely blind F1 racing with no sighted help on driving or navigation what so ever.

Post 37 by Inesle1987 (Account disabled) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 15:25:24

Well okay, let#s say, nearly everything. Of course no dangerous jobs like flying or things like that. A blind dentist would be funny, or a blind architect.

Post 38 by lawlord (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 16:28:00

Bliund formula 1 would be hilarious! People would crash out of the race it's true, just like happens in real formula 1, but unlike real formula 1 it would be competitive, people would overtake, and most revolutionery of all, a different person would win each week! Now here's one for you: how about a blind gamekeeper, blundering around after the poachers? It would be ridiculous! AT least it would be about as ridiculous as a blind poacher!

Post 39 by sugarbaby (The voice of reason) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 16:39:38

hmmm ... what about a blind lion tamer.

Post 40 by Stefan (Generic Zoner) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 17:26:20

once you've had that haircut and that hair-raising adventure on the track, how about a nice meal with me as your blind waitor? who knows what you'll get but i can guarantee it'll probably be not what you ordered

Post 41 by lawlord (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 18:31:09

Hmm yes indeed, and make sure you bring a napkin for when he pours the gravy in your lap. Then perhaps you can settle down afterwards and watch the news, with the blind war correspondent, blundering around Phallujah waiting to see if someone will help him cross the road.

Post 42 by bermuda-triangulese (Help me, I'm stuck to my chair!) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 18:41:51

with regards to pilots. I was actually told in France about an organisation for pilots that are blind, in plains. It's all electronic and the copilot can see. so, that one, guys, is actually possible, the person gave me the address but I have since which forgotten it, but I was increjuless as you all when I heard it.

Post 43 by lawlord (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 18:48:49

I've heard that too, and a more strange and bizarre bunch of people you could never come across, or at least that's what I thought when I met them. And of course the co-pilot can see, but that's cheating! Imagine there were no co-pilot, what then? We're talking about jobs for the blind, that the blind do on their own without someone to hold their hands.

Post 44 by Resonant (Find me alive.) on Monday, 21-Mar-2005 22:58:30

Let's complete our blind pilot's set with a blind navigator, a blind air-traffic controller and blind stuardesses.... "You're exits are here, um, there I think, and possibly over there somewhere... Would you like beef or fish sir? I can't ttell the difference from the packages, but you won't know the difference from the taste so it doesn't matter.... The pilot has switched on the seatbelt sign, nobody panick, oh wait, that's just the microwave."

Erin

Post 45 by lawlord (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Tuesday, 22-Mar-2005 4:15:10

Blind gladiators? UI tell you, the Romans had the right idea. I'd have loved to have seen some of those comic fights they used to put in between the main events at the imperial games, where dwarves fought giants etc. How about, in view of that, a blind bull-fighter?

Post 46 by Inesle1987 (Account disabled) on Tuesday, 22-Mar-2005 4:45:56

Wow, blind pilots? Sounds interesting.

Post 47 by Goblin (I have proven to myself and the world that I need mental help) on Tuesday, 22-Mar-2005 9:22:23

LOL!...WW I'd love to see all blind F1 can you imagine the panic among the sighted pit crew when the leading Ferrari roars in to refuel...

Post 48 by Goblin (I have proven to myself and the world that I need mental help) on Tuesday, 22-Mar-2005 9:24:39

and the word is incredulous! imagine a lawyer being incapable of spelling such an easy word...I'd laugh if it wasn't so pathetic...

Post 49 by sugarbaby (The voice of reason) on Tuesday, 22-Mar-2005 9:40:09

hmmm well actually it wasn't the lawyer who misspelled the word so ... above poss not counted ...

Post 50 by lawlord (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Tuesday, 22-Mar-2005 16:34:24

Oh dear Goblin you've really slipped on a proverbial banana skin, haven't you? It was not I who spelt incredulous in error now, was it? Now if my name were Goblin, I'd be pontificating about how I demand an apology, how everyone's so immature and how nobody is capable of understanding simple things, but thankfully I just find the whole thing funny. You know, if we were to expand this topic from inappropriate jobs for the blind to inappropriate jobs for certain types of people or communities of people, and if I were feeling mischievous, in light of what Goblin has written above I might suggest that to have a Glaswegian in the observer corps would be ridiculous! But of course, I wouldn't ever suggest that, would I? How about a blind jockey, riding a blind racehorse?

Post 51 by lawlord (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Tuesday, 22-Mar-2005 16:36:56

Or a glaswegian mediator? Oops sorry I forgot, the topic hasn't been extended, has it?

Post 52 by Susanne (move over school!) on Tuesday, 22-Mar-2005 18:03:36

Passport forger. Highway lane dividing line painter. Signal flag tower operator. Awesome topic, Lawlord :-).

Post 53 by Susanne (move over school!) on Tuesday, 22-Mar-2005 19:09:18

Cryptologist.

Post 54 by lawlord (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Wednesday, 23-Mar-2005 5:33:12

Sorry susanne but are we talking about a blind passport forder, or a glaswegian one? How about a blind immigration official? There would be even more of the sods getting into the country illegally than we have at the moment!

Post 55 by Goblin (I have proven to myself and the world that I need mental help) on Wednesday, 23-Mar-2005 9:20:12

Fallujah!

Post 56 by Resonant (Find me alive.) on Wednesday, 23-Mar-2005 10:06:50

A blind sniper, or was that covered in the soldier category?
A blind club bouncer, checking everyone's ID,
A blind digital photo-editor, just imagine the beautiful colours... on the teeth and eyes...
A blind city-road-planner, although I suspect most of ours are already.

Post 57 by lawlord (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Wednesday, 23-Mar-2005 11:34:00

A blind film critic specialising in silent films? And Goblin, if I took the time to go back and collect together all your numerous spelling errors they would merit a topic all of their own. Two can play this game old lad.

Post 58 by sugarbaby (The voice of reason) on Wednesday, 23-Mar-2005 13:42:20

now what about a blind dress maker, or a blind decorator, or perhaps, a blind painter. of the artistic variety ... having said that these days you can paint pretty much anything and pass it off as art so maybe not

Post 59 by lawlord (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Wednesday, 23-Mar-2005 19:47:37

How about a blind pirate? I know that's not really a job, but it does pay rather well they tell me and I imagine a blind pirate would be a blundering fool of the highest order.

Post 60 by Susanne (move over school!) on Wednesday, 23-Mar-2005 20:40:42

Professional bird watcher. Gas meter reader. Life guard.

Post 61 by Resonant (Find me alive.) on Wednesday, 23-Mar-2005 22:36:57

Hehe, a blind pirate. With two eye-patches and a guide parrot. Yarhrhrhrhr!! Love the topic btw.
And are there really professional birdwatchers? I suppose ornothology fits the bill. Alright, marine biologist. It was my dream when I was a kid, but it's a surprisingly vision-dependant field.
And, blind fencer? The kind with the swords rather than the kind who build fences, although that could be amusing too.

Post 62 by tara (the Zone BBS remains forever my home page) on Friday, 16-Sep-2005 16:02:50

How about a blind plummer, blind electrician, blind physisist who deals specificaly with light refraction if there is sucha specialist field, and a blind botanist.

Post 63 by Twinklestar09 (I've now got the bronze prolific poster award! now going for the silver award!) on Friday, 16-Sep-2005 16:14:26

I wouldn't think a plumber would be too impossible. As long as you know what tools and parts are what. But I don't know. *smiles* But how about a blind stuntman. Don't know if that one was mentioned but I would think that'd have to be very tricky to pull off. *smiles*
Leilani

Post 64 by Inesle1987 (Account disabled) on Monday, 19-Sep-2005 6:23:15

I don't know if it has already been mentioned, but what about a blind person in the space? An astronaut? That might be quite ... adventurous.